You
by heartdevoured
Summary: Spencer feels like he doesn't need to live anymore when he finds out Derek has a girlfriend...a girlfriend who hates Reid. Spoilers for "Nameless, Faceless" 5x01!
1. Chapter 1: I Never Thought There'd Be

**Alrighty now, this story is based on Evanescence's Amy Lee solo **_**You**_**. Such a sweet little song I had to do it. **

**But here I'm going to be doing things a little differently.**

**I found it quite uncomfortable writing it as if they had said it themselves, so I'm going to put the lyrics in paragraphs above…I hope that's okay with you.**

**SPOILERS FOR: Nameless, Faceless 5x01**

**Okay, enough with me.**

**Reid/Review/Enjoy**

**Gubleronics**

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><p>Spencer got out of bed from his sulking, grabbed his crutches, and made his way over to his desk. He was writing his death letter to Derek and his mother. He wanted kill himself. He knew Derek already had a happy life with his girlfriend, Caroline, and that he would never love him the way Spencer does.<p>

**_The words have been drained from this pencil_**

**_Sweet words that I want to give you_**

**_And I can't sleep_**

**_I need to tell you_**

**_Goodnight_**

Once Spencer was finished he went through all the wonderful memories of Derek and Spencer in his head. He remembered when they were at the hospital and carried Spencer to his car. Oh, he was like a blushing bride, with his awesome husband on the side. Too bad it that was what he _dreamed _of.

**_When we're together I feel perfect_**

He remembered that when he got shot, he thought he was lucky that he only got shot in his knee and not some other serious place. He also remembered when Caroline told him to "keep his gay ass away from her Derek".

**_When I'm pulled away from you I_**

**_Fall apart_**

Spencer reached over and grabbed his phone, dialing Derek's number. _This better stop me from killing myself…_

"_Hello?"_

"Hey, Morgan."

"_Hey, Pretty Boy, you sound a little glum. Something wrong?"_

**_All you say is sacred to me_**

Spencer started silently sobbing. "Oh no, nothing's wrong. I guess…I just wanted to say goodbye."

"_Say goodbye? What are you talking about Pretty Boy? You going somewhere?"_

"Yeah," He grabbed the knife that was laid beside him and stared at it. "I'm going home."

"_Reid, did Caroline say something to you? I know what you mean." _

"Derek please. I'm just so tired. I'm trying to get close, of trying to understand."

"_Trying to understand what?"_

"Trying to understand you! What went wrong!" He stood up and threw the knife on the ground and fell back down again. "Maybe I approached too late."

"_Okay, that's it. I'm coming over."_

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><p>And with that Derek hung up the phone and started to get up, only to be pulled back down by Caroline.<p>

"Is it _him_ again?" She said with buckets of envy.

"Yeah. Why do you say it like that?" He pulled on his underwear, knowing _exactly _why.

"Because ever since he got shot, you always run to his needs. Why can't he just man up and do things on his on? Why can't he call somebody else? I mean, he's got crutches!"

"Caroline, he got _shot_. You sound as if he just fell down off his bike and scrapped his knee. Listen, I don't have time for this. He's about to kill himself and he needs me right now." He got up and reached for the door until…

"Let him do it. He has no life anyway…"

Derek spun around quickly. "What? What did you just say?" He stepped a little closer. "The man is about to take his own life because I'm with you…! Did you say something to him, Caroline?"

She looked down smirking. "I just told him to stay away from us and that he's mine now. That he can't talk to you again."

"_That's _why he's been ignoring me? Because of you?" He suddenly calmed down and moved to the door again, opening it. "You know what; forget it. We're through Caroline. Maybe by then you'll have respect for him once you see that I'm happier with him than with you!" Ending the conversation, he slammed the door, not forgetting the blue navy box. Which was holding a ring that was meant for her…

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><p>Derek couldn't get to his door soon enough. He banged on it. "Spencer! Open up!"<p>

Spencer just took his time, limping slowly to the door. "Calm your horses, Morgan; I'm right here." He opened the door widely, indicating that he wants Derek to come in.

Closing the door when he does, he hands Derek his death letter addressed to him. "Here you go."

Derek looked him in the eye, not caring about the letter at all. "What is this?"

Spencer couldn't really pay attention because he was caught up in Derek's eyes.

**_Your eyes are so blue _**(brown in this case)

**_I can't look away as we lay in the stillness_**

**_You whisper to me…_**

"Ah, um, it's your letter. You're supposed to read it after I die…"

Derek threw the paper down and grabbed his face, placing his lips on Spencer's.

Spencer couldn't believe this was happening. The man he loved was standing here, kissing him as if they did it all the time.

Derek pulled away. "Spencer Reid, I love you." Then he got one knee…

**_Amy _**_(_Spencer in this case_)**, marry me**_

_**Promise you'll stay with me**_

"I know this is rushing into things big time, but I don't care. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to be able to hold you, comfort you, and everything that comes along with marriage. Spencer, I love you and I always have, you've got to believe that. I was going to marry Caroline because my mother forced me into it, but I guess this ring was meant for other things…" With that, he opened the box, showing a silver band that had beautiful designs on it (I don't feel like describing it…).

Spencer was now fully in tears…of happiness. "I don't know what to say." Then he smiled and held out his hand. "Yes. And I love you too."

**_Oh you don't have to ask me_**

**_You know you're all that I live for_**

**_You know I'd die just to hold you_**

**_Stay with you_**

**_Somehow I'll show you_**

**_That you are my night sky_**

**_I've always been right behind you_**

**_Now I'll always be right beside you…_**

Derek slipped the ring on quickly and held Spencer in his arms, kissing him like the world was going to end.

Then Spencer realized it; he was being over dramatic. He had everything he needed, right there in his arms.

**_So many nights_**

**_I cried myself to sleep_**

**_Now that you love me _**

**_I love myself_**

**_I never thought I would say this_**

**_I never thought there'd be_**

**_You._**

**Author's Note: AWWW! How sweet? Okay, now I know you'd have to start dating in order to marry someone, but the sing said, "**_**Amy, marry me" **_**I didn't know what to do!**

**Review it, please!**


	2. Chapter 2: You Poor Sweet Innocent Thing

**Okay, I know that the first chapter may have seemed like it was over (that's how it meant to be), but since this lovely reviewer asked me if was over or not, an idea popped in my head. Caroline was total bitch about Reid and Derek left her for him. So, I decided that I'm going to make her hold a grudge against their relationship.**

**WARNING: Reid's a little OOC because he's pregnant in this, but it's all cool. So, mpreg, violence, minor mention of sexy-times, and slight language.**

**And this chapter is based on the Evanescence song **_**Sweet Sacrifice**_**. It's my second "hate-song" **_***hint, hint*.**_

**Okay now, go on and read.**

**Reid/Review/Enjoy**

**Gubleronics**

Chapter 2: You Poor, Sweet, Innocent Thing…

Spencer smiled slightly when he noticed that Derek had his much muscled arms around him, remembering the night before. Oh, that night felt so good. Everything was right. Finally.

Derek woke up when he felt Spencer attempt to turn around. He scooted down to his fiancée's face and kissed his nose. "Hey, morning."

"Morning, Derek."

Derek turned around to see the clock on the bed-side table. _1:32_. It's early.

"What time is it?" Spencer asked, ready to fall back asleep.

"1:32. Not early. I guess we can go back to sleep." Derek said wrapping his arm tighter around Spencer.

"Yay." Spencer snuggled in his embrace… until the phone rang. He moaned. "No…leave me be."

Derek chuckled as he reached over and grabbed it off its hook. "Hello?"

"_So you just leave me for the fag, huh? What does he have that I don't?"_

Derek sighed; he knew he would have to deal with this. "Caroline, what's done is done. I never really loved you anyway, you know that. I'm sorry you didn't get what you want." He was about ready to hang up when she said something he was pretty sure she meant it.

"_I'm going to kill him. He doesn't deserve you. He's not good looking. He's just…a nobody. A nobody who wasting space on Earth. He doesn't need to be here. I'm going to get him once and for all. And remember Derek, I'm watching you…"_

_**It's true;**_

_**We're all a little**_

_**Insane**_

_**But it's so clear**_

_**Now that I'm**_

_**Unchained**_

_**Fear is only in our minds**_

_**Taking over all the time**_

_**Fear is only in our minds **_

_**But it's taking over all the time**_

_**You poor sweet innocent thing**_

_**Dry your eyes**_

_**Ad testify**_

_**You know you live to break me**_

_**Don't deny**_

_**Sweet sacrifice**_

With that, she hung up, leaving Derek afraid and overly-protective.

He about suffocated Spencer. Something was beyond wrong. "Derek, what did she say? You're suffocating me…"

But Derek didn't let go. He squeezed harder. "She's out to get you. She's going to kill you. Caroline…"

Spencer was tugging away from his deadly embrace. "Derek…I can't breathe…"

Derek let go and kissed Spencer, holding his hand. He pulled away only to met Spencer's concerned and scared face and explained. "Caroline is obviously upset about us being together and she has an explainable rage against you. Spencer every time I talked about you, her breathing speed up and she always…never mind." He knew Spencer wouldn't want to hear what she did to get him out of his mind…

"What? What'd she do?" Derek refused to look him in the eye. "Tell me, Derek."

"Okay, but you're not going to like it…. She always…had sex with me to get you off my mind. All I have to say about that is that it worked." He said, chuckling as he went in sweet memory. Laughing; he thought this was funny?

Spencer gave him a blank stare and swung his legs over the bed, grabbing his crutches to walk away. "It's great to know you still have those type of moments in your head. Now I have a raged women out to kill and you think it's funny."

Derek's smirked slipped away as he followed Spencer in the living room. "Baby Boy, no. I absolutely don't think it's funny. I'm here to protect you and I said you wouldn't like it."

Spencer turned instantly, startling Derek. "Then why did you laugh, huh? Was it really that good? You're making me think you miss her and the…thing that went with it! Why do you always feel the need to protect me? I can take care of myself and protect myself too! You're acting like I'm the girlfriend in this situation!" He hit him hard in the knee with his crutch and sent him falling.

Derek hissed in affliction and confusion, holding onto his knee. What just happened there? It took him some time to develop before answering. "Pretty Boy, I never said I missed her or the sex. It was mostly forced and rough. I know you can take care of yourself; it's just that you're so young and cute that it makes me want to keep an eye on you every second of every day. I'm sorry if I make you feel like you're the girlfriend in this relationship. Forgive me?" He extended a hand.

Spencer's face softened and took his hand, helping him up and hugging him. "I'm sorry, I was overreacting."

"Hey, it's what you do, right?" Derek smirked.

Spencer's face went from soft and lovey to raged and angry. He pushed Derek away and started hitting him with one of his crutches again.

"Hey! Pretty Boy! Stop that!" Derek yelled, covering his head.

Spencer stopped and paused all together, then started crying.

Derek was officially terrified. "What's wrong with you?" He got up and reached out to pull Spencer back in his arms.

Spencer continued sobbing. "I really don't know. I keep getting this weird feeling in my stomach and my emotions keep messing with me."

Derek pulled him closer as realization dawned on him. Spencer was pregnant. After just one night of pleasure. "We need to get you to a hospital."

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><p>When they got back home, Spencer was still in shock. "I still can't believe this. It's something that rarely happens."<p>

Derek held him at arms length. "But it happened to us, and we're very lucky."

"I know that, but it's so uncommon. I'm happy of course, I'm just scared that if Caroline finds out I have a baby, she'll try to kill me and the baby." He didn't notice he was rubbing his hand over his stomach, attempting to hold onto his crutch at the same time.

Then the phone rang again. It was _her_.

Derek reached for it, until Spencer stopped him. "I can handle it." Picking it up, he answered. "Hello?"

"_You little fucker. You took him away and changed him. Turned him queer. You're going to pay. Once you're dead, he's going to forget all about you and forget you ever existed. Forget your name."_

_**One day**_

_**I'm forget your name**_

_**And one sweet day**_

_**You're gonna drown in my lost pain**_

_**Fear is only in our minds**_

_**Taking over all the time**_

_**Fear is only in our minds **_

_**But it's taking over all the time**_

_**You poor sweet innocent thing**_

_**Dry your eyes and testify**_

_**And oh you love to hate me**_

_**Don't you honey?**_

_**I'm your sacrifice**_

Spencer took a short shaky breath. "Caroline, you need to understand…"

"_I don't have to understand anything, you queer! You changed him and made him yours. He doesn't care for you! He c-cares for m-me! H-he loves m-me! He w-was going to h-have that b-baby with me!"_

She was sobbing. For what? He didn't know. She found out about their child. How? He **still **didn't know. "No, he _loathes _you. I never made the choice to make him mine, he just came to me and decided to have a life with me, and actually be happy. And the baby? We never planned on that. It just…"

"_That baby's mine. He'll look just like me because it's mine. You have three hours to give it up and let me have it. And if I don't get a right to my child, there'll be very upsetting consequences…"_

The line went dead he dropped the phone. She couldn't do this. She **can't **do this. This was their child, their family. He came back to the world as Derek picked him up off the floor. He was too much in the state of sock to notice he fell down.

"Spencer, baby, what's wrong? What'd she say?" His hands were sliding up and down his arms.

"We have to leave. Today." He said, getting up to move to their bedroom, until Derek stopped him. "Derek…"

"Spence, what'd she say?" He demanded.

Spencer sighed. "She said that you were planning on having this baby with her and that it belonged to her. That it wasn't mine. She told me that we have three hours to let her 'have' the baby or there will be "upsetting consequences". Derek, we can't let her have this!" He gestured to his stomach. "We just can't… We're leaving. Right now."

And that when the power went off.

"Spencer, I want you to go to the room and hide! I'm going to go see what's going on. Caroline may have been here." With that he was off.

_**(I dream in the darkness**_

Spencer wanted to call out to stop him but he was already gone. He cautiously made his way to the bedroom, when his whole world seemed to turn black. His head was spinning and someone was standing over him, breathing heavily. Caroline.

_**I sleep to die**_

"I told you I'd get rid of you, bitch. Now it's your time to pay." She raised whatever weapon she had in her hand and hit Spencer with it.

_**Erase the silence **_

Spencer was wondering how this was happening to him. How this was always happening to him. He knew that his baby was never going to make it out at this point, because he was planning on letting go. Of his life. His love. His everything.

_**Erase my life)**_

He was about done, until he reached out for his crutch and hit her violently, surprised by the strength he had.

Caroline was on the ground, continuing to hit nothing but the floor.

Spencer smiled painfully, yet victoriously. "Didn't think a cripple man could take you down, did you?"

She continued to whimper and struggle. "Derek's mine, he'll always be mine…"

Spencer must've hit her hard. He bent down slightly, noticing the pain in his stomach. "You poor, sweet, innocent thing; dry your eyes. And testify! You know you live to break me don't deny sweet sacrifice."

_**Do you wonder why you hate?**_

_**(Our burning ashes**_

_**Blacken the day**_

_**A world of nothingness**_

_**Blow me away)**_

_**Are you still too weak to survive your mistakes?**_

Spencer finally gave in the pain and fainted, falling in the world of black sheets.

He awakened at the sight of Derek holding his hand, looking worried as hell. "Hey, Baby Boy." He looked just like he did when he was infected with anthrax.

"How long was I out? How's the baby? What happened to Caroline?"

Derek smiled wide and chuckled. "You're going too fast. You were out for a couple of hours, the baby's doing fine, and Caroline is in an institution." He started rubbing the back of his hand. "You scared the hell out of me, Pretty Boy. When do you ever stop?"

Spencer smiled and brought his hand up to Derek's neck. "When people stop deciding they want to be psychotic."

**_You poor sweet innocent thing_**

**_Dry your eyes_**

**_And testufy_**

**_You know you live to break me_**

**_Don't deny_**

**_Sweet Sacrifice_**

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><p><strong>Author's Note: WHOA! Seriously long chapter! Any ways, sorry I left you hanging. I'll reward you with a cursing and much contracted Spencer…<strong>

**REVIEWS!**


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